Looking for the best jokes to tell at Christmas? To help make your festive season merry and bright, we have researched the best Christmas jokes for the whole family to enjoy.
From fun cracker jokes to hilarious festive puns, keep reading for all the jokes that will keep you laughing into the New Year.
Funny Christmas jokes for 2025
1. What do snowmen eat for Christmas? Ice cookies
2. What do you call a child who doesn't believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus
3. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house
4. Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey — he's always stuffed
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5. Which of Santa's friends is the most chilled? Jack Frost
6. What was Santa's favourite subject in school? Chemis-tree
7. What's as big as a Christmas tree but lighter than a feather? A shadow
8. How do you get Christmas trees ready for a night out? They get spruced up
9. Why did Santa go to the doctor? Because of his 'bad elf'
10. Which one of Santa's elves has the best dance moves? Dancer
11. What athlete is warmest in winter? A long jumper
12. Why doesn't Santa eat junk food? Because it's bad for your elf
13. Why can't penguins fly? Because they're not tall enough to be pilots
14. How do Christmas trees get their emails? They log-on
15. Why doesn't Santa go to the hospital? He has private elf care
16. What would you give your dog for Christmas? A mobile bone
17. What does one Christmas tree say to another? Lighten up
18. Why is a foot a good Christmas present? Because it makes a good stocking filler
19. What do snowmen call their offspring? Chill-dren
20. How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas? He was hooked on trees his whole life
21. Who delivers Christmas presents to sharks? Santa Jaws
22. What did Santa say at the start of the race? Ready, set, ho, ho, ho!
23. What do you call a greedy elf? Elfish
24. How do you know when Santa is in the room? You can sense his presents
25. How do sheep wish each other a Merry Christmas? Merry Christmas to ewe
26. How do Christmas angels greet each other? Halo!
27. Who hides in a bakery at Christmas? A mince spy
28. What's an elf's favourite music genre? Wrap
29. What did the farmer get for Christmas? A cowculator
30. Why are Christmas trees bad at sewing? They always drop their needles
31. How does Santa keep track of all the fireplaces he has visited? He keeps a log book
32. What's an Arctic wolf's favourite time of year? The Christmas howl-idays
33. What's green, prickly and flies through the air? A holly-copter
34. Why do reindeer wear bells? Because their horns don't work
35. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite
36. What did the Chrsitmas tree say to the ornament? Hang in there
First look at Emma Bridgewater's 2024 Christmas collection
Classic mugs
'Tis the season for a new Emma Bridgewater mug. This set of two comes presented in a gift box and is perfect for popping under the Christmas tree. We love the new peace and love design, featuring a green and red colour scheme.
Festive stockings
One tradition you're never too old for is putting out your Christmas stocking. This beautifully sewn patchwork stocking, featuring festive illustrations of holly, is perfect for holding lots of presents on the big day.
Gingerbread house design
Nothing says Christmas quite like a gingerbread house. The new range from Emma Bridgewater includes these charming gingerbread mugs and bowls — a wonderful addition to any kitchen cupboard.
Colourful plates
Emma Bridgewater's fairy lights range first launched last year and is back for another season. Choose from bowls, plates, serving platters, and more in the colourful design.
Mulled wine ready
There's nothing like a comforting cup of mulled wine to warm guests on a cold day. Serve up this cosy Christmas classic in EB's large enamel cooking pot, which is back for another year.
Iconic designs
Fans of Emma Bridgewater's iconic designs will be pleased to see some festive classics back on the shelves. Serve up a stack of freshly baked mince pies on the 'Mince Pies' plate and pour over some brandy butter in the matching jug.
Festive bedding
Decorating your bedroom for Christmas? From festive quilts to pretty scatter cushions, you'll find some charming choices in Emma Bridgewater's 2024 range.
Winter flowers mugs
Winter flowers brighten up our gardens when all else has died back. Pick up one of these pretty mugs for yourself and grab another for a friend — they make lovely stocking fillers.
Lisa Joyner is the Deputy Daily Editor at House Beautiful UK and Country Living UK, where she's busy writing about home and interiors, gardening, dog breeds, pets, health and wellbeing, countryside news, small space inspiration, and the hottest properties on the market. Previously, she has written for Conde Nast Traveller, House & Garden and Marie Claire magazine. Lisa studied at University For The Creative Arts, where she completed a BA in Fashion Journalism.
